Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Celebrating a Season

Well you might have noticed I have been absent for a while.  This past semester, really this past year has been a crazy one.  Not that the rest of my time at Covenant hasn't had its ups and downs and been chaos at times.  This last year of being in my internship about did me in at times.  The funny thing about it though, it wasn't even seeing the clients that was so hard, that I love.  It was the rest of life that was messy, complicated, hard, and just really sweet.

The Lord was gracious this past semester to give me a glimpse in to the world of counseling during the month of January to really decide that this is something that I feel called to do.  For me it has been something that I have had confirmed over and over again as I sat with different clients, talked with my supervisors, and also talked with my peers.  At this point I don't have a job but I'm on the hunt here in STL.

For me this past semester has been one in which the Lord really challenged me to wrestle with Him.  To trust him and to ask questions of who He is, who he was, and who is he calling me to be.  Let me tell you, wrestling with God is not fun.  It was a long drawn out process, but man am I glad that I have done it.

Something else the Lord really showed me this semester is just how big he really is.  He has called me to trust him, even when I don't really understand or see what is going on.  He is present in darkness, he is bigger than Satan, and he can handle my questions.  He is someone who is kind and gentle to those he loves.  He delights in those he created and finds us beautiful.

I have continued to delight in, be blessed by, challenged by, and deeply miss the community the Lord has given me here.  He truly has spread people to the ends of the earth but this year has been a success in part because of those that have come alongside me and supported and prayed for me. These women and men who have spoken truth to my heart this year are irreplaceable.  Thank you for your support and impact on my heart.

Not that this past year wasn't ambiguous enough already, I'm entering in to a time of unknowns as I job hunt.  I will be here in STL for the time being.  I'll give you a graduation post soon.  I'm back. I've got time and a life again!

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